How shameful, I never realized the gift of the days with little baby Liam. I want those days back. I will never get those days back.
So, as I've been packing away infant odds and ends I have been praying for another baby. I have also been praying for a better mindset when/if the next one comes. If only I weren't so depraved, perhaps I would see what is in front of me and not miss God's blessings. I know I caught some of them...but I want to catch all of them, like goldfish in a net, just swoop them all up and take them for my own.
Can one ever really live like this? Can one's eyes be open at all times to what God is doing, how He is working? I shed tears over this: that I cannot be closer to God, close enough to see what He is doing in my life at the moment. Hindsight really is 20/20, sadly. So I will continue to pray daily that I would have my eyes on God and that I wouldn't miss out on the blessings life that He is giving me.